Confessions Of Recovering Perfectionists


If you’ve ever:
Scoffed at 92%…
Retaken the same photo 10+ times…
Insisted on just one more game until you win….
Cried over spilled milk (literally or figuratively)

….then this post is for you. But you’re in good company (or at least, we like to think you are) because this post is also for us, the self-proclaimed recovering perfectionists. It’s confession time again.

Perfection does not exist.gif

Excuse our Cady Herron aha moment, but perfection does not exist! It is a magic trick of epic proportion, David Blaine style.

And while it’s natural to want it all – the perfect career, marriage, body, home, and balance – especially when it appears that the people around us have achieved that, it’s just not realistic. Forget realistic, it’s not even possible. Struggles and imperfections are embedded in the experience of being human.

But here’s the flip side (and it’s a big one) – our perceived quirks and shortcomings add a depth of authenticity and a feeling of “You too? I thought I was the only one!” that pretty much leave perfection in the dust.

It’s so much more interesting to be flawed. It’s why we romanticize flaws and quirks – it’s why Zooey Deschanel’s quirky-cute persona is so popular, it’s why we kind of love to hate Hannah Horvath, it’s why teenage boys hide behind their hair-flip made popular by awkward tween Justin Bieber. Perfection is a lie, but its perceived truth is also so flipping boring. It’s so much more interesting to make mistakes.

We’re not here to preach, but we’re here to tell you that you’re not alone. We’re still figuring it out, and we’re still learning how to accept our own flaws. We’re not entirely there yet, and truthfully, we may never be.

So, in the same way that “life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful” we’re offering some other small discoveries:

Your body doesn’t have to be flawless to be beautiful…but it’s okay if you struggle to remember this. We all struggle to remember it. There’s no qualities that make a woman “beautiful” or even “real.” We’re all beautiful and we’re all real. But we know that it’s one thing to say this, and entirely another to mean it. It’s easy to put on a girl-powered song and dance around your bedroom like you’re one of Taylor Swift’s back up dancers. You’re going to shake it off, you’re a lion, you’re fierce, etc etc etc. It’s almost easy to do that – or at least show your friends that you’re doing that on Instagram or Snapchat. Hashtag dance party! The harder part is meaning it, believing it. And it’s okay if you don’t believe it, at least not today. This is why we have to be there for our fellow women, to remind each other of the things that we sometimes forget.

Your purpose doesn’t have to be fully mapped to have meaning. Let’s be real, do any of us really know what our purpose is? You may feel like your only purpose right now is to empty your DVR or hit up Starbucks on the way home, and that’s okay. We’re not just saying that – it really is okay.

FOMO sucks, but doing stuff you don’t really want to do sucks more. It’s easy to feel like everyone is having the ~TiMe Of tHeIr LiVeS~ when their Friday nights are captured through a lo-fi filter or splashed with a geotag in their snap story. But life is short and life is weird. If your heart would be happier from those comfy sweat pants and a five-hour binge-sesh of Gossip Girl, then Chuck & Blair it is. We know. It’s sh*tty to feel like you’re not “doing” your twenties right, or something along those lines. But it’s sh*ttier to force yourself into social situations that you just don’t freaking want to be in.

In the midst of striving to be better, at any given role or skill in your life, ultimately, we need to remember this: You are worthy and you are enough. Right now.

{featured image via unsplash}