At 5 months pregnant, I’ve had my fair share of awkward encounters with strangers wanting to discuss my pregnancy. Although many people think they’re being polite and showing interest, most of the time, it’s just plain awkward and leaves me feeling incredibly self-conscious.
Pregnancy is a very personal and emotional experience for most women, so air on the side of caution and try to avoid these questions and statements, especially if the person isn’t your close friend or family member.
Can I touch your stomach?
Let me just save you some time and tell you that, no, you may certainly not touch my stomach, random stranger! Oddly enough, the notion of personal space still exists when you’re pregnant!
Look how big you’re getting!
Yeah, I know. None of my clothes fit and my thighs rub together when I walk, but thanks for the insight! I feel much more confident now!
I can tell it’s a boy/girl from the way you’re carrying.
I don’t know what that means exactly, but congratulations on making me feeling incredibly self-conscious. I’ve always wanted everyone in the immediate proximity to study my body like it’s a Rubik’s Cube that only they can solve.
Your body will never look the same again.
Well that’s reassuring…
Are you having twins?!
Nope, just came from lunch…
You think you’re tired now, just wait til the baby comes!
This is exactly what every expecting mother wants to hear. Please excuse me while I have a panic attack and purchase stock in my local coffee shop.
Are you planning on breastfeeding?
I’m planning on finding a way to end this conversation as fast as humanly possible.
Were you trying to get pregnant?
Were you trying to be inappropriate and overstep your boundaries by asking me a highly personal question? I’ll answer yours when you answer mine.
When’s the next one coming?
Not sure yet. Maybe I could, like, push this one out of my body first?
Are you planning on getting an epidural?
Yes. In fact, I’d like one now please.
Jillian is part of the Contributing Writer Network at Thirty on Tap. To apply to become a Contributing Writer, please click HERE.