Having a baby can certainly be a beautiful, miraculous, life-changing experience. It can also be summed up as a lot. A lot of hormones, a lot of emotions, and a lot of wtf is happening in my body right now moments. We often see and share the blissful postpartum snapshots, but we don’t always get into the less than glamorous, nitty-gritty details. That said, we’re here to help a pregnant girlfriend out and dive into what those first couple postpartum months are really like. You’re welcome, and also, we’re so sorry.
Your boobs will leak. Possibly a lot.
We knew that with breastfeeding came the possibility of a little leakage here and there, but we were unprepared for just how much milk would escape. Word to the wise, invest in a box (or 12) of nursing pads or be prepared to say goodbye to your favorite ‘Namastay in Bed’ nightshirt.
There will be blood.
Speaking of pads, now is a good time to start stocking up on discreet incontinence and sensitive bladder underwear. Forget what you used to wear on day three of your period. That was the minor league. You’re in the majors now. Overnight pads may as well be pantyliners for those first few days postpartum. Adult diapers are the way to go.
2 words: night sweats.
Keep a pair of extra pajamas on your nightstand for when you wake up feeling like you just finished a hot yoga class. With all the extra fluids our bodies retained during pregnancy, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that it all had to escape somehow. We just never imagined that it would be in the form of so much sweat.
All the feels are normal feels.
Never have we ever been so on the verge of laughter, tears, joy and exhaustion all at once. Resist the urge to label your feelings as good or bad, and know that whatever you’re experiencing is natural.
You might still look pregnant.
We weren’t the first (and probably won’t be the last) to be asked “when are you due?” days after giving birth. View this time as an invitation to appropriately wear sweatpants all day, everyday and know that you’ll feel a little more like yourself each week.
You might not be able to sit down. For like, several days.
Pregnancy hemorrhoids are bad, but postpartum hemorrhoids are like all of the circles of hell combined. Take our word for it and buy yourself one of those inflatable donuts, carry it around in your bag, and don’t feel any shame. Also, Tucks Pads forever and ever, amen.
The hair loss
After all the immediate aftershocks go away, then comes the hair loss party. Taking a shower and noticing a clump of hair in the drain? Casual.
Aaaand the hair regrowth.
Honestly what did we do to deserve this? We created life and now we have to look like death, warmed over? Can someone explain please?
The “pregnancy line” overstays its welcome
Also known as the “linea nigra,” that weird dark line on your tummy just hangs out for the better part of your baby’s first year on earth. Probably solely to remind you that once upon a time you were preggo, just in case you forgot or something.
Surprise! More blood!
The first time your period comes back, make sure you are stocked up. As in, buy out an entire shelf of products on CVS. You won’t regret it. Also, soft pretzels are always a good idea.