Let’s get one thing straight: the internet is simultaneously the best and worst thing to have ever happened to moms. On the one hand, you can google a homeopathic diaper rash ointment at 2 in the morning. On the other hand, google will also convince you that your baby might have diaper rash, but he also probably has a food allergy, some incurable skin condition, and maybe you should also see an early intervention specialist while you’re at it. (Rule number one: Don’t google anything.)
But it’s not just Google that’s the enemy; it’s Instagram. And Pinterest. And all those cute kitschy Mom Blogs that make motherhood seem way too easy (and aesthetically pleasing). Who among us hasn’t tried to bake broccoli quinoa cheddar muffins only to have their toddler throw them on the floor and demand Goldfish crackers instead?
Ahead, let’s take a look at some of the most notable offenders when it comes to Expectation Vs. Reality…Motherhood Edition.
Expectation: My little one will love this craft project I found on Pinterest! We’ll bond and laugh and in the end, I’ll hang it on the fridge!
Reality: There’s glue in my hair. And on the floor. And pretty sure my kid ate some glue, too.
Expectation: The other moms are going to be soOoOoOo impressed with the bento box filled with organic (and colorful) food my kid takes to PreK.
Reality: Most of that is coming home with the kid. Or it’s on the floor. If they knew how to trade it for crackers, they would.
Expectation: I’m going to be so productive during this nap. I’m going to clean the house. I’m going to prep dinner. I’m going to fold laundry. I will be unstoppable.
Reality: On the couch. For 2 hours. It was glorious.
Expectation: I will put away my kids’ toys every night.
Reality: *steps over toys on the way to the fridge* I’ll clean that up tomorrow.
Expectation: Maybe if we just snuggle, we can both get some much needed rest.
Reality: I’m shivering, clutching 1/8 of a blanket, and my toddler just gave me a black eye.
Expectation: I can’t wait to wear coordinating outfits and look ~so~ cute together.
Reality: I haven’t washed my hair in three days and I slept in these clothes last night. ICYWW, I will also sleep in these same clothes tonight.
Expectation: My girlfriends and I will get together with our babies and will be just like old times!
Reality: Hold please. My toddler just ran into the kitchen. *Insert how moms get their cardio here*.
Gifs via Giphy.