Fill Up. Empty Out.

BY KATE KOLE

I became a fitness instructor and yoga teacher before I became a mom.

The trend towards self-care and inspirational Pinterest boards took off during my training tenure and I enthusiastically turned into a spokesperson for the popular social media proverb, “You can’t pour from an empty cup”.

I cringe a bit each time I recall the way I would readily offer that insight. After class, someone would share with me that it felt so nice to practice. That she knew she needed to do it more often. But between work, and family, and life, it was just hard to find the motivation, and space, and energy. I would nod. Understanding that of course, we all face obstacles. But she needed to take care of herself too, I’d say. Because how could she meaningfully show up for her work, and her people, and her life if she wasn’t tending to herself first? I posed the question rhetorically. Food for thought when she had the time to digest it.

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Some Thoughts On Change

Some Thoughts On Change

By Jillian Stacia

I’ve had a lot of change lately. That’s an understatement, actually. In the last year, I’ve gotten pregnant, been promoted, had a baby, went back to work, quit my job, started freelancing full time, and dyed my hair blue.

Things have changed so much so fast, and I still feel like I am reeling.

Here’s what I know: I am happier than I have ever been, probably because I feel more like myself than I ever have. My life is finally a representation of my values, and that feels amazing and right and whole.

But I also feel like I’m floundering. Each time I start to find a rhythm, I am pummeled by change. The carpet is ripped out from under my feet, and I have to start all over again. Continue reading

The Things I Never Knew Before Becoming A Mom

The Things I Never Knew Before Becoming A Mom

By Chelsea O’Neal

I never knew many things before becoming a mother. I had heard “stories” from other parents but like many people, I thought “surely those are myths.” And then I became a mom and boy did things change.

I never knew how scary it was caring for another tiny little human. How delicate I’d think she was. How afraid I’d be to make the wrong decision in even the simplest of situations. I never knew I wouldn’t leave the house on time ever again. Or that when I’d finally leave, I’d be toting around a giant bag of everything in the house.  Continue reading

Life Is Both.

Life Is Both..jpeg

By Kate Kole

When I lived in Houston, my favorite radio station had a weekly prank call segment where the DJ would regularly repeat the phrase, “honey, we all got problems,” with a thick southern drawl. It was like listening to a scene from SNL and I’d often laugh so hard that I cried, hearing the outrageous personal issues she’d list in detail to the stranger on the other end of the line.

Her voice and that expression have stayed with me over the years and I’ll often find myself replaying some variation of those words in my mind. They’re my reassuring reminder that none of us is without insecurities, imperfections, or self-doubt. That regardless of how confident, poised, and put together our lives may seem from the outside looking in, we’re all dealing with something, or more accurately, some things. Continue reading

Does It Make Me A Bad Parent?

Does It Make Me A Bad Parent

By Chelsea O’Neal

Does it make me a bad parent? That’s the question that kept running through my head the other day. That’s the question I repeated over and over in regards to every parenting decision I am making. Does it make me a bad parent?

Does it make me a bad parent if some days I feel parenthood is just a little too overwhelming? Does it make me a bad parent if some days I just want her to sleep all day so I can get a breather? If I get annoyed sometimes when she’s climbing all over me, fussy and wanting me to hold her? If every time she grabs a handful of hair and yanks and I just want to yell “stop!Continue reading

Grieving Through The What-Ifs

Grieving Through What-Ifs

By Becky Houdesheldt

This weekend my husband and I had to return the crib and dresser we purchased for our second baby. It was one of the most difficult things we’ve ever had to do. Because we paid with cash, and had no receipt, the team lead told us we’d get in-store credit for the department the furniture came from. I quietly told her we were no longer pregnant, and that being restricted to the baby section of the store was not something I wanted.

Writing about this loss has not been easy. It is a tricky thing, writing about grief. Especially the grief over a loved one we hadn’t even had the chance to meet yet. Grief is a strange thing, and dealing with loss has a tendency to be a lonely process. It seems to me as though we, as humans, have a difficult time trying to find the right things to say to help someone coping with grief and so, sometimes the easiest way to handle it is to give space to those grieving. Continue reading

7 Things I’ve Learned About Life And Motherhood Lately

7 Things I_ve Learned About Life And Motherhood Lately

By Chelsea O’Neal

In a world where society seems to tell us that we have to be perfect and to do everything with perfection, it’s a breath of fresh air to step back and realize a few things, not only about life, but about ourselves and those around us. That refreshing feeling of coming to place of really appreciating all that there is and accepting ourselves just the way we are.

Here are 7 things that have been enlightening in my daily routines: Continue reading

Good Enough Really Is Good Enough

When Good Enough Really Is Good Enough.jpeg

By Kate Kole

I love Melissa McCarthy and I really love Ellen DeGeneres, so I was a little bummed when I forgot to record their interview a few days ago. I asked my parents if they’d seen it and immediately knew they hadn’t when my dad responded something along the lines of, “Oh yeah. It was so funny.”

“Okay, so you didn’t see it either.” I said.

“Why do you say that?” He asked.

“Because, you’d say it was just okay,” my mom and I replied in unison. Continue reading

11 Pregnancy Symptoms That Are Straight-Up Bizarre

By De and Kate

Having both been pregnant within the last year, we often send multiple “so this is a cool thing happening in and around my body today” messages to one another. Because, while we know that carrying a child is a gift and we wouldn’t trade the opportunity, it can also be a little weird, uncomfortable, and kinda gross. Staying true to our promise to always keep it real on Thirty On Tap, here are 11 pregnancy moments we’ve experienced that didn’t fall within the typical back pain, weight gain, and food cravings that we fully expected. Continue reading